When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
My cat gives me a boner
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
