He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
