Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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