I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
