Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
