The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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