what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize