My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
What drink are we having for lunch?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
