it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
