why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
