Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Randomize
