Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
