Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
