i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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