i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
