Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
