Where is the hickey?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
