Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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