The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
