Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
