You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Randomize
