i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
