I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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