I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
false alarm. still invincible.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
