no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize