My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
