so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
