I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
