69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
