I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I touched a dick in church today
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
