This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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