: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize
