Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
