Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
