The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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