i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
