Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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