: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize