yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
