She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Randomize
