id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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