omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
How external is "for external use only"?
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
