what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize