Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Randomize
