I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Randomize
