tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
