Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize
