Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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