Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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