do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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