Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
